Cookie Slappings

Ever been slapped in the face by a cookie? No, not WITH a cookie, but BY a cookie. Up until Friday night I could answer that question with an emphatic NO. Unfortunately, since then, times have changed. I went to a Chinese buffet with a good friend and had a great meal. It was all fun and games until I opened that god-forsaken fortune cookie at the end of the meal. Here it is (for your viewing pleasure, and my disgust).

I was floored. Not only did it berate me, it also let me know that I had to accept it. Who am I to say otherwise? Over the years I have come to accept the basic concept of what the cookie says. "Que Cera Cera, Whatever will be will be," it is reasonable enough. We are all small pieces to a large puzzle, I get that. But do we need to cram it down my throat? If, for example, I were a hot-head, hell-bent on changing everything, would this not compel me to prove the cookie wrong? "Who says it is meant to be?" I would ask. "Certainly not me, by god!" Then I would go about changing the situation by ANY means necessary. "I'll show you!" would become my new motto. "GODDAMN COOKIE!!!" I would encourage all like-minded citizens to take up arms and champion the cause for change. Do we really need any more goddamn zealots? Are we not trying to roll back such actions with the Department of Homeland Security?

I don't mind saying I was appalled by this cookie. I am forwarding this message to my local congressman (and I urge you to do the same). We need to stop these "FORTUNE" cookies in their tracks, before they can get their inflamatory message out to the masses.

Justice

I have to admit that it is a rare event when someone gets what is coming to them and justice is served. Man, was I excited to hear about the conviction of Warren Jeffs this morning. He is the fundamentalist whacko "prophet" of the Church of blah, blah, blah, of blah, blah, blah. He arranged the "marriage" of the 14 year-old girl to her 19 year-old cousin, against her will. Then she did the unthinkable. She protested. Apparently you are not allowed to do such things in this cult. You see, "Brother Jeffs" receives his messages from god, himself and, therefore, anything he says goes. Boy, is that convenient. Where can I buy some of that moxy? He seems to have gone to the Jim Jones School for Manipulation of the Weak-Minded, or possibly the David Koresh School of Let's-Arm-Ourselves-and-Make-a-Stand-Against-the-Government. I only wish Janet Reno could have stopped Jeffs in his tracks too. But, no, he was found guilty by a jury of his peers, so that will have to do.

Cloudless everyday you fall upon my waking eyes...

As I type this I am listening to my second revolution on the turntable of Pink Floyd's 1971 masterpiece, "Meddle". While nowhere near as commercial as the Wall, Wish You Were Here, or the Dark Side of the Moon, it is every bit as monumental in the development of the group's sound in the early 70s. With the departure of Syd in 1968, Roger became the "surrogate" head of the band, but at this time there was a lot of experimentation going on. The 23 minute, 31 second Opus - Echoes would become a staple of the group's live performances and give them a format to follow in future recordings. In fact, I (as well as many other Floyd afficionados) will tell you that Echoes does in 23 minutes what Dark Side of the Moon Does in 42. The dream-like lyrics are accompanied by soft, mellow, sounds that morph into a jazz-pop rhythm, then into a whale song interlude before returning to the main theme and fading out.

This really wasn't meant to be a record review, however. The above scan shows the remnants of the once proud facade of the Meddle album. The record itself is in a similar state. I bought it at the Valley View flea market in Brookfield Ohio, from a guy named Bob. I was looking through the dollar bin (most records were priced $3.00) and came across it. Meddle is hard to find in ANY condition on vinyl. I didn't care if it would play a note. I took it to the counter, HONORED to take it home in any condition (This is true. Some would argue that I need a life). Bob charged me a quarter (the same denomination that threatened our friend two posts ago!). A GODDAMN quarter for PINK FLOYD's MEDDLE!

Since then I have rinsed, sprayed with Windex, and "scrubbed" with a soft paint brush this album. There is a constant sizzle of static throughout the recording, but the skips are at a bare minimum. Keep in mind this record is scratched beyond recognition. The label on the disc is completely gone. It looks as though this album nearly floated away in a flood.


The introductory photo and this are all that remain of the water damaged sleeve, but GODDAMN if this beat up old piece of vinyl doesn't have a beautiful sound!

While I could leave my thoughts there, the whole idea of this "romantic" post was to lament the closing and DESTRUCTION of the Valley View flea market. The former muse became even more familiar with the afore mentioned Bob than I myself did and I took Mr. Rosenberg to the same location at least once or twice. I fondly recall an older gentleman by the name of Steve who had a European accent and also sold records. I told him of my journey to Branson Missouri and the Mickey Gilley concert I took in with the chief and every time I went back he had several albums reserved for me. I would pay him the couple bucks whether I needed the album or not. I hope to find these gentlemen at similar locations in the future. If not I wish them the best of luck, and I hope they can find an outlet to share their love of recorded sound with others that they shared with me.

Jena 6

After listening to the reports on this story I wanted to come home and write up some thoughts. Before I could get to the computer I received a somewhat heated phone call from a good friend who had been listening to the same reports and who, while fundamentally on the same side of the ISSUE, took exception to the coverage. I would like to outline my thoughts and then get your feedback.

Let me first say that I believe Don Imus got the shaft. Does he say things that he shouldn't? Yes. Does this make him a hate-filled bigot. No. If you listen to Glenn Beck, Sean Hannity, Rush Limbaugh, Michael Savage, Ann Coulter you will find hate-filled rhetoric and character assassination that hides behind the first ammendment. I don't challenge their right to broadcast what they broadcast and do from time to time enjoy the airwaves of the EIB network. My only point is that Imus' comment was stupid, childish, inappropriate and worthy of an apology,censure,fine, etc., but not the witch hunt that led to his departure.

Having said that, as I understand this story in Jena, there was an outside gathering on the school grounds. The one shaded area was normally occupied by a certain group of white students. One or more of the black students ASKED FOR PERMISSION to sit under the tree. They didn't want to cause trouble. They were given permission and sat with the white students (are we back in the 60s? Are we not past this?). The next day there were nooses hanging from said tree. The white student (or students) was given a 3 day suspension from school. Upon returning to school the "6" apparently beat him within an inch of his life and were charged with attempted murder. If these are not the facts, than I truly do not understand this case.

If the above is true than I say the attempted murder charge was probably little more than racism, and I am glad that the charges have been reduced to assault. Should this group be charged with assault? Of course they should. Was the beating justified? I say yes. When you live in Louisiana, two years out of Katrina where the Bush administration is still taking heat for their delay in responding to the needs of the poor black community, and race relations are strained, who in their right mind would think that hanging nooses on a tree would be a good idea?(nor would it ever be a good idea). Personally, I think the bastard is lucky he made it out alive. My guess is he won't be displaying such public hatred for any minority group any time soon. If I were a parent of the 6, I would be proud, having said that, you can't beat a person half to death and walk away unpunished. Working with the 11-14 age group, I know that when there is a fist fight, it is counted as assault and the authorities are called in, regardless of the kids' skin color (most of ours are white).

So I guess I don't understand the protest, and I know that was the purpose of the above-mentioned phone call. If people are there to show support of the 6, hell, I am with them. If they are saying that these kids did nothing wrong, they are fighting a losing battle.

For all those that fear change...

"Welcome disgruntled consumer. You have reached the Simpson's replacement box hoax, I mean hot-line,"
so I was greeted by Homer Simpson after dialing the 800 number on the insert I received with my season six of the Simpsons boxed set. To back up, season six was the first set they released in the new plastic Simpson's head style (this one is Homer's head). My first thought was, "that's crummy, it will throw the whole collection out of whack on the shelf,' and after speaking to a good friend in the retail business, he explained that it was crummy because this package would be more prone to theft.
I don't mean to diminish the season because there many classic episodes such as "Homer Bad Man" which features the gummy Venus de Milo and the "sweet, sweet can...", Bart vs. Australia in which instead of taking "the boot" as a punishment for international fraud Bart moons the nation with a message on his ass (to which Lisa says, "I'm amazed at how legibly you wrote on your own butt," Homie the Clown which is becoming my favorite episode of all time, and of course, Who Shot Mr. Burns? (Part One)

At any rate when I first bought the set I didn't care for the packaging, but had to have the season. I didn't know that there were 2 versions. When I opened the box there was an insert that looked like this...

I heard from Homer in the message above and was directed to simpsonsbox.com. At the time I could not download the form to send in and didn't continue the transaction. After upgrading to DSL, I updated the system and downloaded the form. It began as this:

Welcome complainers, all those that fear change, and greedy people who like free stuff...

I then had to answer the following question:

Reason for wanting a new box:

Anal Retentive (box must be identical)
Lonely (will pretend box is new best friend)
Will sell new box to collector nerds for huge profit
Just like free stuff
Big Baby

Obviously it was number one. So I sent it in with the original receipt and a couple bucks for shipping and handling (at the same time I mailed in the Fall Guy rebate), and waited. Just as I started to think it was a hoax, the box arrived today. Those guys at Fox are OK.

...and the music played on

I begin this post with a respectful nod to Queen City Musings, which for certain political reasons, is no longer in existence. The Blogspot is a little less witty, and a little less informative, and a lot less cheerful today, and as we are now beginning Ramadan I think it is only fitting to cry out, "CURSE THE INFIDELS!!!" Were it not for said Muse this site would not be up and running, and I welcome his comments and even his postings if he would so grace us here.

I did have the chance to download the Steppin' Out video last night, and what a flashback. I was on the right track with my comments yesterday. What I had forgotten was that not only was Joe Jackson sitting in the lonely hotel room while the busy city went on without him, but so too did the chamber maid dream of Stepping Out as she made up the room of the well-to-do woman, dancing around while holding up a borrowed evening gown. While not melancholy, the song and the video both have a bitter-sweet feel, and the Jazz/Pop sound of it and the Night and Day album rank it, at least in my mind, somewhere near Steely Dan's Aja.

and the band wore blue shirts...

I got reacquainted with an old friend last week and have been meaning to sit down and write about it but just haven't. Most of you are familiar with him, Joe Jackson. I have been a fan of Steppin' Out since it was released in 1982. I remember the video of him playing piano in that lonely room. There was always something haunting about it. It takes place in New York City where millions of people are buzzing around but here was this musician sitting by himself with his music. He sings about stepping out into the night with a significant other but does the exact opposite (at least as far as memory serves, I have tried to download the video but have only gotten the beginning clip. I haven't seen it in 20 some years.) Steppin' Out is the centerpiece to the album Night and Day, the fifth album and the one that would define his style. 1997 was the year that I began to revisit Joe Jackson after that initial fascination in the early 80s. Look Sharp! and I'm the Man were his first two albums. They had catchy tunes and were done in the New Wave Pop/Punk style. I borrowed the records from my uncle and recorded them on Maxell (or was it Memorex?) tapes and vividly remember listening to them back and forth from my hometown of Sharon, PA, to my then new residence of Athens, OH, a 4 hour drive. In those early days I often had company in the car. Shortly thereafter I would be making the journey by myself. I remember several nights being in the kitchen, sipping on a glass of wine, making dinner for two, and listening to Night and Day. As 97 became 98 the song Breaking Us In Two seemed to be hitting closer and closer to home. Goddamn! How did he know?

As 98 became 99 I left, and then returned to the Athens area. At that time I would be making Zatarain cajun rice as dinner for one and listening to the Body and Soul album from 1984.

"Did you do me right? Did I do right by you? When I bared my soul it seemed you did not hear. Can this be true?"

Again, I was amazed at how he knew just what I was feeling, and experiencing.

By the way, remember the Public Defender on Night Court who did a season before Markie Post? Ellen Foley. She does back up vocals on this album.

At any rate, we were in 1999 and Joe Jackson had been releasing several new albums including Symphony No. 1 and even wrote an autobiography of his early years. Turns out he was a geeky music major too. I could really relate to this guy. Then came Night and Day II in 2000. It was, again, haunting and lonely but very much a sincere, heartfelt masterpiece. I drank many a beer listening to it. The album cover is even more haunting today. It shows Joe through the rearview mirror of a New York taxicab heading toward the World Trade Center (I intentionally did not write this yesterday).



Well, to wrap this ramble up, I moved on and listened to other things. I made some positive changes and lost a major portion of the gloom and self-pity. Unfortunately I always associated Joe Jackson with those "Dark Ages" and while I never lost interest or the love of his music, I chose not to listen to it. Night and Day, however has been creeping back into rotation on my turntable and now into the iPod, as well. I have since imported Look Sharp!, I'm the Man, Summer in the City, and so on. I listened to these on that same 4 hour trip back to Sharon, PA this past weekend and all I can say is, "Welcome back. I missed you!"

"Betray-Us"

Well the much awaited report by General Petraeus came out today. Funny how he gave a disclaimer saying that all of the following words were his own. Well, of course they were, General. Who else would they belong to? (certainly not the law-abiding open-door administration that you are reporting for.) Anyway, at least he suggested a draw down in 30,000 troops by summer 2008. I guess that's a start. To be honest I am really not concerned by the vaccuum that would be created by our immediate withdrawal, nor the answer to that loaded question "are you going to tell all the families of men who died that they died for nothing?" These people are smarter than the public gives them credit for. They are well aware of what was accomplished by the loss of 3800 troops:

"We Got HIM!" Yeah!!!!

Funny how this administration can redefine and expand their powers, getting around any and every obstacale in their way, but they just couldn't get around that whole "Anti-Assassination" thing put into place by of all presidents, Gerald Ford.

Mr. Rosenberg, Mr. Rosenberg

At the request of my good friend, Sol, I went to the Simpsons Avatar generator and came up with this likeness. I hope it does him justice. I would, however, like to see his own interpretation of himself, myself, and possibly the QCM. I tried to create one of Tony but could not capture his likeness.

I. too, am returning from a weekend away. My mother and I watched the movie "Breach" last night. It tells the story of how Eric O'Neill began working for, and ultimately causing the downfall of Robert Hanssen. Hanssen was a member of the FBI for 25 years but was found to be leaking information to the Russians. I very much enjoyed the story but would like to do some fact checking. The movie suggested that O'Neill brought down the worst spy in American history. I remember following the story as it unfolded in 2001, and it may just be that the government was covering its tracks and not letting out too much information out at the time, or it could be that the writers/directors were taking creative license. I don't recall him being such a "powerful" figure in those old reports. Maybe my memory is failing. Any ideas?

SpringGarf

Having visited the Simpsons Avatar creation site I decided to post a Springfield self-portrait.

That takes care of that.

George W. Boob

I was just visiting the Queen City Muse's page and re-read an exchange I had with a mysterious "person" who goes by Kirby. Tony had posted a farewell to Alberto Gonzales to which I added some colorful commentary on his performance as Attorney General. Kirby accused me of hating all conservatives and requiring professional therapy. This may be true. I certainly could use some counseling in the area of undying support of George W. Bush. I honestly do not understand it. Everything we said about him since 1999 has been proven true. He is incompetent. He does not have the best interests of America in mind. He cares only about the Bush family and people with whom they do business. He is arrogant, smug, and snickers at us whenever he delivers an address to the public as if to say "I may not be the smartest cow-poke, but I know something you don't know."

Yes, I am an admitted "Bush Hater". There is no getting around that. My hatred died down somewhat after the 2004 election because John Kerry was even less competent. He allowed himself to be manipulated by the right-wingers and the media and was made to look like a villain by his fellow Vietnam Vets. While Bush did not deserve a second term, this guy fucked himself as well as the rest of us. John Kerry will burn in hell.

I have done all I could do. I registered Republican in 2000 and voted for John McCain. He was moderate, honest, and sensible. Apparently that's not what the party was looking for.

Let me also say that while I did vote for Bill Clinton in 1992, I did not vote for him in 1996. I could not vote for Bob Dole who in every appearance sold himself as a bitter old man who was out of touch with every aspect of American life, but I decided that if that was America's choice I would be OK with it. So while a democrat, I don't think I am blinded by party lines and I tend to lean to the middle.

At any rate this has rambled on long enough. Please tell me why you still defend George W. Boob. I honestly do not understand.

"When a body meets a body..."

When I first heard a report on the "Bodies" exhibition on NPR I was hooked. I couldn't wait until it was brought somewhere near me so I could see it. My first glimpse came in the newest James Bond movie "Casino Royale" which came out about a year ago. Today I got to experience it firsthand at the Easton Market in the Greater Columbus Ohio area. I know there was a controversy over whether or not the exhibition of dissected, flayed, and posed human beings was morally right or wrong and I know there are people who would stop it if they could. All I can give is my own take on how it affected me physically and emotionally.

I must admit that when I got in line for the ticket I didn't think my stomach could handle what I was in for. My friend Tony seemed to have the same thought. He said, "we probably shouldn't have eaten right before we came here". I think its fair to say that the hardest part was getting into the first room and standing face to face with the bones, musculature, and EYES of the first cadaver. Throughout the exhibit that was the one thing that bothered me. I understand why it was done, and I do not question it, but God-Damn it was unnerving to see those eyes without eyelids screaming at me like a horror movie. That made the experience real. There was no escaping the fact that this person once stood among us (the living) but does so no more. The little feet and hands also drove this point home (what did they create in their short time?). I was very much humbled by the experience. As gruesome and macabre as some could say this display is, it is very much grounded in reality. For all our outward differences, break us down to the basics and it is all the same. These people have simply completed the cycle. I don't mind mentioning that my eyes are watering as I type this.

I heard the argument that it is disrespectful to take the body of a once living person and pose them with a basketball as if they were in a Gatorade commercial, minus the skin (and the dignity). I am no sports fan (band geek, dungeons and dragons player, etc.) but the poses were tastefully animated; they showed the body in action, what it looks like to actually use those muscles. Each and every pose was dignified and beautiful in an aesthetic way. I took out my sketchbook when I got to the display of the heart. When is the next time I will be able to draw from an actual human heart without harvesting it myself?

One display that I simply bypassed was the fetuses/babies. I did look into the liquid containers that held the different stages of human embryos, but when I saw the shapes of the little skeletons after the first trimester and the full sized infants, I moved on. While I could indulge my morbid curiosity about a full grown being, it was simply too much to consider the loss of such a little person. This may make me sound like a conservative, but I can assure you this is not the case. I understand that we live in a gray world (not clear cut black and white) and that there are issues and elements beyond our control that force people to make life altering (ending) decisions, and I hope I am not put in that position. I do not believe that it is in our best interest as a nation to hunt these people down and condemn them to death (as some zealots would, at the same time they try to eliminate the welfare system) but, on an afternoon of discovery, and just hanging out with a friend, I could not bring myself to face such issues.

I think it is safe to say that my companion did not have the same experience in the exhibition that I had. It just wasn't "his thing", and it may not be yours either, but if you can believe the observations of a hopeful cynic, I think that you will find the "Bodies Exhibition" to be a very rewarding experience.